Recently I had a really rough week. It felt like I was treading water and at any moment I was going to go under and drown.
Tears flowed.
And frustration.
Sadness. Loneliness. Despair. Pain. Heartache. Grief.
I wished things were different.
They weren’t.
I’m sure you have been there too. When the oceans of life seem too deep to traverse. When all you know in your heart to be true, seems the opposite to what you experience.
Perhaps you’ve felt bad when you’ve struggled to trust and hope. That’s the place I found myself in. I know God doesn’t condemn, but I felt disappointed in myself. Why couldn’t I do better?
The answer, I feel, is that I am human. I hurt when my heart breaks. I don’t understand my suffering.
At one of my lowest points, I put worship radio on, trying to dig myself out of the deep pit I’d found myself floundering in. And this song came on…
Trust in you – Lauren Daigle
Letting go of every single dream
I lay each one down at Your feet
Every moment of my wandering
Never changes what You see
I try to win this war
I confess, my hands are weary, I need Your rest
Mighty warrior, king of the fight
No matter what I face You’re by my side
When You don’t move the mountains
I’m needing You to move
When You don’t part the waters
I wish I could walk through
When You don’t give the answers
As I cry out to You
I will trust, I will trust, I will trust in You
Truth is, You know what tomorrow brings
There’s not a day ahead You have not seen
So let all things be my life and breath
I want what You want Lord and nothing less
When You don’t move the mountains
I’m needing You to move
When You don’t part the waters
I wish I could walk through
When You don’t give the answers
As I cry out to You
I will trust, I will trust, I will trust in You
I will trust in You
You are my strength and comfort
You are my steady hand
You are my firm foundation
The rock on which I stand
Your ways are always higher
Your plans are always good
There’s not a place where I’ll go
You’ve not already stood
When You don’t move the mountains
I’m needing You to move
When You don’t part the waters
I wish I could walk through
When You don’t give the answers
As I cry out to You
I will trust, I will trust, I will trust in You
I will trust in You
I will trust in You
I will trust in You
I fully understood those words about her struggle. I wanted to trust. I didn’t know how.
At this time, I heard God say to me, “You only need faith the size of a mustard seed to move a mountain (Matthew 17:20). The tiny bit of faith you feel like you have is enough”.
Wow. I knew He was right. Even at my lowest, I’ve always known that my hope is in Him.
So, if like me, you find yourself treading water, just hold tight to your mustard seed sized faith; remember that He loves you; remember that He works all things together for good for those who love Him and who are called according to His purpose (Rom 8:28). And trust. He has you in oceans deep. He will move mountains for you.
A girl growing mustard seed sized faith xx
Scripture references: The Holy Bible (several translations)
Photo credit: Clem Onojeghuo https://www.pexels.com/photo/blue-ocean-sea-water-175773/
© Girl Growing. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission, from this blog’s author and owner, is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Girl Growing, http://www.girlgrowing.com
girlgrowing 