trust – girlgrowing

Hope//Be still

When I’m at the end of my rope, in God there’s still hope.

Thursday 4 January 2018Saturday 10 February 2018 girlgrowingLeave a comment

“Anchor”

I have this hope
As an anchor for my soul
Through every storm
I will hold to You

With endless love
All my fear is swept away
In everything
I will trust in You

There is hope in the promise of the cross
You gave everything to save the world You love
And this hope is an anchor for my soul
Our God will stand
Unshakeable

Unchanging One
You who was and is to come
Your promise sure
You will not let go

Your Name is higher
Your Name is greater
All my hope is in You

Your word unfailing
Your promise unshaken
All my hope is in You

(By Hillsong Live)

All my hope is in you…

These lyrics gets me every time. It’s my ‘I’m at the end of my rope, but in God there’s still hope’ song.

I’ve had something on my mind lately – reminders here and there – of a time long past, but not forgotten. I don’t know how to describe the magnitude of the situation/experience in just a few words, so I’ll suffice with a simple recap…

As an 18 year old, I got a knock on my door from my pastors, who were there to tell me that a friend (a young child) had been tragically killed in a truck accident. Our families were and are close. It seemed surreal. I handled it as any one would – with ups and downs.

One of the most difficult things was watching his mum grieve. She had lots of ‘why?’ questions on her mind, as did we all.

I didn’t have answers (for her or myself).

But God gave me an incredible assurance – the kind you don’t forget – that while we didn’t understand the reasons, nevertheless, God is good.

GOD IS GOOD.

Selah…

It’s a simple statement that holds immense truth.

It’s a revelation thing – you can say it, however you don’t really know and understand it until God shows you for yourself.

I know that right now many of you may be experiencing tough times and sadness over all sorts of things. I really encourage you to ask God to show you His goodness (in spite of whatever is going on).

And rest in it.

‘Be still and know that I am God…’ (Psalm 46:10).

Scripture references: The Holy Bible (several translations)

Photo credit: lum3n.com

https://www.pexels.com/photo/anchor-architecture-building-concrete-237694/

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Treading water// Oceans deep

When you find yourself treading water, just hold tight to your mustard seed sized faith and remember that He loves you. Trust. He has you in oceans deep.

Saturday 7 October 2017Saturday 10 February 2018 girlgrowingLeave a comment

Recently I had a really rough week. It felt like I was treading water and at any moment I was going to go under and drown.

Tears flowed.

And frustration.

Sadness. Loneliness. Despair. Pain. Heartache. Grief.

I wished things were different.

They weren’t.

I’m sure you have been there too. When the oceans of life seem too deep to traverse. When all you know in your heart to be true, seems the opposite to what you experience.

Perhaps you’ve felt bad when you’ve struggled to trust and hope. That’s the place I found myself in. I know God doesn’t condemn, but I felt disappointed in myself. Why couldn’t I do better?

The answer, I feel, is that I am human. I hurt when my heart breaks. I don’t understand my suffering.

At one of my lowest points, I put worship radio on, trying to dig myself out of the deep pit I’d found myself floundering in. And this song came on…

Trust in you – Lauren Daigle

Letting go of every single dream
I lay each one down at Your feet
Every moment of my wandering
Never changes what You see
I try to win this war
I confess, my hands are weary, I need Your rest
Mighty warrior, king of the fight
No matter what I face You’re by my side

When You don’t move the mountains
I’m needing You to move
When You don’t part the waters
I wish I could walk through
When You don’t give the answers
As I cry out to You
I will trust, I will trust, I will trust in You

Truth is, You know what tomorrow brings
There’s not a day ahead You have not seen
So let all things be my life and breath
I want what You want Lord and nothing less

You are my strength and comfort
You are my steady hand
You are my firm foundation
The rock on which I stand
Your ways are always higher
Your plans are always good
There’s not a place where I’ll go
You’ve not already stood

I fully understood those words about her struggle. I wanted to trust. I didn’t know how.

At this time, I heard God say to me, “You only need faith the size of a mustard seed to move a mountain (Matthew 17:20). The tiny bit of faith you feel like you have is enough”.

Wow. I knew He was right. Even at my lowest, I’ve always known that my hope is in Him.

So, if like me, you find yourself treading water, just hold tight to your mustard seed sized faith; remember that He loves you; remember that He works all things together for good for those who love Him and who are called according to His purpose (Rom 8:28). And trust. He has you in oceans deep. He will move mountains for you.

A girl growing mustard seed sized faith xx

Scripture references: The Holy Bible (several translations)

Photo credit: Clem Onojeghuo https://www.pexels.com/photo/blue-ocean-sea-water-175773/

Welcome to 2016

This past year was challenging to say the least. Yet there were silver linings too. How has yours been? Ready for the new year?

Friday 1 January 2016Saturday 10 February 2018 girlgrowingLeave a comment

Firstly, apologies for disappearing off the face of the earth over the past few months. 2015 was, in a word, challenging. I began the year feeling it was the year to live as if the things I hoped for had already come to fruition. As we all know, anything worthwhile comes with a price-tag, and boy, did I pay! The year was filled with immense trials to say the least! {and ridiculous joys too! So important to not forget…}

So yes, a crazy year all in all, and somewhat quiet in the land of blogging, but I’m back… and at some point, I’ll fill in some of the gaps from the year that I would have gladly wished away, yet am so blessed to have lived. If every cloud has a silver lining, then the things I’ve learnt and the ways I have grown along the way are my sparkles…

As we head into the new year, I want to share a song that has blessed me immensely, as I hope it will you…

It is well (Bethel)

Grand earth has quaked before
Moved by the sound of His voice
Seas that are shaken and stirred
Can be calmed and broken for my regard

And through it all, through it all
My eyes are on You
And it is well with me

Far be it for me to not believe
Even when my eyes can’t see
And this mountain that’s in front of me
Will be thrown into the midst of the sea

Through it all, through it all…

So let go my soul and trust in Him
The waves and wind still know His name…

Know that this year, I’m a girl praying and believing that you will come to know our beautiful Saviour in a much deeper and more intimate way than you ever have before. And as you grab a hold of Him, I know He will show you His faithfulness in a million and one ways, both big and small…

I’m a girl growing {putting one foot in front of the other, holding onto God’s hand, in order to finish what He has started in me}

The Waiting Game: Don’t Ask Why

Why am I still single? Does God not see or care about my pain and disappointment? Should I even be asking these questions?

Saturday 30 August 2014Friday 9 February 2018 girlgrowing1 Comment

When I was younger being single was easy and carefree. And then, I got a little older and suddenly, every Tom, Dick and Harry felt like they had the right to question everything about me and to give their unsolicited opinions and advice on how I should live my life.

99% of the time, I’d laugh off their ridiculous statements and questions, but occasionally, I’d rather foolishly take on board the things they said, and begin to ponder…

Why AM I still single?

Is there something wrong with me?

Am I not {prayerful, attractive, wise, faithful, Godly, financial…} enough?

Have I missed the boat?

Will I have to settle for marrying my friend’s cousin (the one that he/she wanted to set me up on a blind date with, the one that I have nothing in common with, the one I find unattractive in every way, the one who’s about a billion years too old for me, the one who has no ambition or dreams…)? And, if that’s the case, why does everyone else get to be with someone amazing, whilst I get left with the dregs?

How is it fair that I am still single, yet Mr and Mrs Crazyface are happily married? (They’re that couple we all know who seem to defy gravity – living in a self-absorbed way, never showing any wisdom in a single life decision, always taking advantage of others etc.; yet also seeming to constantly win at life)

Does God not see or care about my pain, frustration and disappointment?

These questions would swirl around my mind like a whirlpool (or more accurately – a cesspool) on those tough days. They spoke negativity. They stripped me of hope. They never made me feel good about myself or my future, or even God for that matter. They were dumb questions!

And then one day, a little while back, I read Lamentations 3:25-29 (The Message version). It says,

‘God proves to be good to the man who passionately waits, to the woman who diligently seeks. It’s a good thing to quietly hope, quietly hope for help from God. It’s a good thing when you’re young to stick it out through the hard times. When life is heavy and hard to take, go off by yourself. Enter the silence. Bow in prayer. Don’t ask questions. Wait for hope to appear.’

I thought about these words and heartily agreed… with most of them… This was my mindset, my belief, on all of my good days. But… ‘Don’t ask questions’??? When I read those words, I felt somewhat offended and got a little angry with God. Don’t ask questions – You (God) make me wait for all these years, with no answers, and then you’re like, ‘Don’t ask questions’! You’ve seen my faithfulness, even when it was the last thing I felt like giving, and you don’t think I deserve to ask a few questions? What????

And in that moment, I knew I had to decide, would I do what I knew was right even if it went against everything I felt? (Sigh… why can’t obedience be easy! Ha ha)

That day, I stopped asking why. I replaced my questions with trust.

Don’t get me wrong, I still get annoyed at the dumb things people say. But now, I don’t let their questions lead me to questioning who I am or who God is, and the plans He has for me life. When bombarded with their questions and thoughts… I anchor myself in Christ.

Like a young child will jump off the edge of the pool into his/her dad’s arms, with complete trust that he will catch them, I now remember that as I jump into the life God has for me in this moment, He will catch me and lead me forward into my tomorrows and whatever they hold.

I maintain hope as I remember that I am fearfully and wonderfully made (Ps 139:14), and He has good plans for my life (Ps 139:16, Jer 29:11). And furthermore, if I want good things for my life, how much more must He (Mt 7:9-11, Is 55:9)!

Whatever stage of life you’re at today, you no doubt have a few questions swirling around your own mind. Perhaps they are similar to those I had. Or perhaps you’re asking, Why don’t I seem to be able to get ahead? How will we survive financially? Have I missed my calling? Why can’t we get pregnant? Why are the kids being so challenging right now? How will I ever be enough (for my marriage, job, parenting role…)?

For me, not asking questions hasn’t meant throwing all common sense to the wind. If I was asking how I’d pay my bills, then that would be a reasonable thing if it was what was motivating me to go to work each day. I guess, I now seek answers to the things that I can do something about, but I trust God with the ‘unknowns’.

What about you and your questions?